After the Orlando Magic eliminated Lebron James' Cleveland Cavaliers from the NBA playoffs on Saturday and James refused to shake hands with his opponents, The New York Times quoted James: "It's hard for me to congratulate somebody after you just lose to them. I'm a winner. It's not being a poor sport or anything like that. If somebody beats you up, you're not going to congratulate them. That doesn't make sense to me. I'm a competitor."
Wrong. The ultimate competitor is the athlete who makes self, teammates and the game better, through sportsmanship. James is superb on levels 1 and 2. On Level 3, he fell down, badly. He has show himself to be selfish, arguably arrogant, and clearly has no concept of how he is to behave if he is to be a positive role model.
James, admirable in so many ways, is sending a bad message to youth athletes: he, as a "competitor," is too upset by losing to honor the game he plays and which supplies his livelihood.
Former NFL coach Herm Edwards nailed it. "The game is sacred....When you are out on the field, you must remember your legacy and what you are representing."
The best competitors are strong enough to make the game better by overcoming their disappointment--and even anger--to congratulate their opponents at the toughest time, right after they've beaten you. Your opponents will remember this gesture, and you will earn respect by showing your discipline and courage.
-- adapted from a message from Jim Thompson, Positive Coaching Alliance Founder and Executive Director
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